


letters of regret.

by Blackcatyaoi



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Abandonment, Abusive Relationships, Character Death, Comfort/Angst, Cutting, Denial of Feelings, Drinking to Cope, Drugs, Goodbyes, Guilt, Hurt No Comfort, Letters, Loneliness, Loss of Control, Love/Hate, M/M, Mild Blood, Pain, Papyrus (Undertale) Needs a Hug, Sans (Undertale) Needs a Hug, Smoking, Stress Baking, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide, Tears, nothing here is okay
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-26
Updated: 2019-05-28
Packaged: 2020-03-17 18:09:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,384
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18970360
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Blackcatyaoi/pseuds/Blackcatyaoi
Summary: dear brotheri'm sorry. i am so sorry.love papyrus.





	1. the first.

dear brother. 

i hope your well sans , i haven't heard from you in a long while. it's been almost two years now that we really talked. we have grown so distant and i have to ask , even knowing i will not be around to hear the answer. did you ever really love me? sans did you really care about me? i can guess your answer but honestly i'm scared to be correct. isn't that funny sans? i'm a completely and total cowered , too scared to admit the truth even if it's staring me in the face. 

hey sans did you know that for a long time i pretended to be happy? hell i already know i couldn't do anything right. how useless do i have to be for happiness to be a chore?. well it doesn't really matter anymore. i'm sorry , i'm so sorry. sans bye the time you get this i'll have done something horrible and i know you may not care but please just don't hate me anymore then you do now. sans if i could fix myself to be better to be the brother you deserve then i would have done it in a second but i'm hopeless. i won't fool myself anymore , i know i'm completely useless and it's alright soon i'll be out of everyone's way. sans can you ever forgive me for being such a failure of a brother? can you forgive me for wasting your time and energy? it's okay if you can't , i wouldn't have forgiven me ether. ha it's funny that i can only now admit what everyone's been thinking. i knew it but i was to fucking pathetic to admit it. i was hoping it wasn't true but hell i can't pretend forever. 

i guess it took me finally opening my eyes to see what i am. i am a failure , a joke someone forgot the punchline to. i never deserved love , hell the only time i tried ended horribly , i was so just to stupid to see they wanted me gone. i wonder if mettaton only dated me out of pity? well if he did i have to say he did let me see the light finally. i learned just how annoying i was. i can't cook , i'm a neat freak and i'm too fucking stupid to do anything right. sans i wish i can say he was wrong with everything he's done but i deserved it. i deserved to be tossed aside. i was a poor choice to begin with. i mean hell i hurt him constantly. i made him too tired to perform because i was selfish. i refused to give him so stress relief because i was a horrible person. i caused so many problems for him. everything he's said was true , i am a useless person. i'm ugly and stupid and hell i deserve to dust. i deserve the worst. i'm not pretty , not like the others. i had only a nice body but even that soured. i was fat and just unwilling to fix it. but i have tried sans , i have tried to be better but i just couldn't. 

sans i'm so sorry , i'm sorry for always making your life harder and making you unhappy. so i hope after i'm gone after all of it's over and done with you can finally be free from the torture that is being related to me. i mean why else would everyone so happily abandon me at the first chance they got? i couldn't have been more blind to what was happening but now i can see sans. i can see the truth and it hurts. sans i'm weak , to weak to live with the guilt of knowing i've been hurting you for so long. 

please just forget about me, forget that i ever existed. i will soon be gone and everything will be perfect then. no more phone calls , no more text . i will never bother you again and it will be perfect. so goodbye sans , i wish i could have been a better brother. 

love papyrus.


	2. Chapter 2

dear undyne

undyne i wish i were to send this letter with happier emotions but i find it's impossible. undyne this be the last time we ever speak and i really wish this would be a happy type of situation but i need to be honest now. undyne i hate what you've done. i hate you and i don't want to but i can't stop this ugly emotion from building inside me. undyne i want to see you as a friend but i can't because i know you never considered me as one. undyne i wanted to tell you the truth something you have never done for me. i want to know why you never thought of telling me the truth undyne. why you never said you weren't even considering letting me join the guard. undyne you played with my dreams , you made it sound like i had a chance to be something. your pity hurts undyne. it hurts in a way you can't imagine , undyne i feel like my soul was torn apart when i finally admitted it was hopeless for me ever joining the guard.   
did you only ever pitied me? was i just a joke for you to laugh at? undyne you promised to never lie to anyone. the day we meet you said you would never lie to me and yet you continued to do so for so long. did you think i was too stupid to join? or was it because i was empathetic to others? undyne i need to know the truth , not to be lied to for years. the worst thing? i don't hate you for that. i don't hate you for that , i hate you for claiming you would save anyone who needed it but then turned your back on me. i cried out of you to save me for so long and you left me to drown. i called you begging to come get me , to save me from the pain mettaton was drowning me in and yet you told me i was being overly dramatic. undyne i watched my supposed to be boyfriend cheat on me, he hurt me with his words and actions and you know. you know and you didn't save me. why ? why do you call yourself a hero when those who needed you the most never get your help. i was supposed to be your friend and when i call out for you to help me you turned your back. i know i was a joke but i didn't think you would so happily leave me to suffer. undyne i was falling apart as you seemed to grow happier the less you heard from me. did you hate me that much? did you enjoy watching me fall for every sweet lie? you must have but i guess i began to bore you huh? 

undyne i always looked up to you. i always thought you were a hero , a hero who would come running in to save anyone who needed help but you lied. you lied to everyone. you only save those who would give you fame or attention. for those who begged you to save them and those you turned your back on i have to say , you no hero. your not a hero undyne , your a faker who pretends to be a hero. even so i wanted you to be around. i want you to be there through everything. i wanted you there for when i finally broke , hoping against all else you would save me. am i did biggest fool? maybe but undyne you the cruelest person i can think of. you may try to blame my brother but at least he never ignored my call for help. he never left me when i called out to him. undyne i so tired of this life. i broken in a way i never thought possible. i'm not strong enough to keep going on , i just so tired of it all. so i have decided to end this hell. i'm sorry undyne but i can't wait for a hero anymore , i can't keep living this life. 

 

goodbye undyne i hope you become everything you ever wanted.

from papyrus.


End file.
